DENNIS: My name is Dennis. I’m the son of immigrants. Chinese-American. And I identify as gay.
CAROLYN: Hi. I’m Carolyn and I’m Dennis’s sister.
DENNIS: I always knew that I was gay. Even when I was a child you just know that something is different.
CAROLYN: I love him the way he is no matter what that is. And I accept him 100% fully. From the day you started playing with my Barbie dolls and my My Little Ponies. And you let me do your hair. And you’re like 3. You know, he’s my brother.
DENNIS: It’s hardest to come out to the people that you’ve known the longest because I feel like… it just is. I don’t know why. it was easier to come out to people in college and people that I just met but since we knew each other for this long, I felt bad for keeping this secret.
CAROLYN: When he first came out to me, it was like it was meant to be. It just reaffirmed something deep inside that I knew about him. And I was so glad. I was 100% supportive and just wish that he had come to me sooner.
DENNIS: I don’t think coming out is a single event. I think coming out happens all the time. There are new things that Carolyn learns about me everyday; there are new things I learn about Carolyn everyday too. Some of the things she learns about me sometimes are connected to my sexuality; sometimes they’re not.
CAROLYN: You’ve been so into “gay rights” that it’s become my passion too. And if you haven’t been behind the whole social movement behind it, I wouldn’t have known about some of the issues that the gay community is facing.
DENNIS: With my mother, I know I am personally going deeper into conversations, letting her know a little bit more, gradually and gradually. I think the bottom line is that my mom has made it very clear that she loves me and that’s all I need.
DENNIS: This is my high school graduation. This is 2002. This is my sister, my mom, and my dad. And I just thought it was a really good picture of us. All of us look really good.
DENNIS: My experience of race in high school and middle school on top of being gay and being feminine and flamboyant… you know, I was a happy kid as you saw.
CAROLYN: Yeah yeah all the time.
DENNIS: Yeah, all the time. And I really felt like… I mean I still am, but it took me while to get that back cause in middle school and high school it was really crushing.
CAROLYN: I would’ve gotten involved, because no one messes with you.
DENNIS: I think that being Asian Pacific Islander and gay at the same time poses challenges. It’s one thing to be otherized because I’m Asian but on top of that I’m also dealing with my sexuality too.
DENNIS: I’m lucky. My mom knows. And even if I told my dad, I’m very confident that they wouldn’t kick me out; they wouldn’t disown me; they wouldn’t take away all my finances, or whatever. I’m very confident that they wouldn’t do that.
CAROLYN: If your sister or brother is gay, don’t be scared. And don’t react. Because once you show that reaction then it just creates more of a division. And you know, just listen. Listen to your sister or brother. Listen to what they have to say. And try to accept them without any judgment.