our portraits, our families – navin dargani and navin manglani

Navin Dargani and Navin Manglani
w/ Sunita Manglani – mother, and Meeta Manglani – sister

Images by Nelson Chang

Our friends affectionately call us Navin squared. Beyond just sharing the same name, we also have a common heritage and set of values that have played an important part in our relationship. Both of our families are entrenched in their respective Sindhi communities in New York and Manila, which led to us to compare many of our life experiences when we first met. One of those comparisons was of our individual coming out stories which, remarkably, occurred within months of each other, before we even met. Both of our families thought sexuality was a phase that we might outgrow. Both of our families had fears about what our futures would hold without a traditional relationship. We spent months answering questions — about safe sex, AIDS/HIV, whether we were born this way, and even whether it was possible for us to marry a woman to satisfy societal expectations and keep our sexual orientation a secret.

Our journey was not an easy one. Thankfully, both of us have mothers and families who, over time, have become loving and supportive. Looking back, it was our honest and open communication with our families that created the solid foundation for our relationship. The process made us realize how brave and unconditional our parents’ love for us is, especially in the face of a community that sometimes called our union ‘unacceptable’ and ‘disgraceful.’

Our families watched us commit our lives to each other in Sonoma, California in 2011 in a beautiful commitment ceremony that demonstrated just how far we, our families, and our communities have come. At the end of the ceremony, a Hindu pandit (priest) with generational ties to both our families offered a prayer and then amazingly, two huge rainbows appeared in the sky. It was like the universe was saying you’ve done right, like the heavens approved. A month later, we tied the knot in Manhattan, on the first day same-sex marriage became legal in New York State. Truly, our relationship has been and continues to be marked by a series of firsts.

“[We] realize how brave and unconditional our parents’ love is, especially in face of a community that called our union “unacceptable” and “disgraceful”.  

Through the photographer’s eyes

Navin M. opened the door and let me into his mother’s home, an apartment 28 stories up looking out onto the East River in New York City. As I bent down to take off my shoes I noticed the aromatic smell of Indian spices from their Easter Sunday brunch. In the foyer, greeting me as I walked in was a statue of the elephant-headed deity, Ganesha, symbolic in Hinduism as the remover of obstacles, fitting given the journey described to me by the Navins. This was one of the first photographs I took that day. It was a beautiful detail in a Manhattan high-rise that had me wondering about this family’s heritage and